Crocs

Two crocodiles were sitting at the side of the swamp near the  lake.

 The smaller one turned to the bigger one and said,  "I can't

 understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same

 age; we  were the same size as kids. I just don't get it."

 "Well," said the big croc, "what have you been eating?" 

 "Politicians, same as you," replied the small croc.

Hmm. Well, where do you catch them?" "Down the other side of the

swamp near 

the parking lot by the capitol.""Same here. Hmm. How do you catch

them?"

"Well, I crawl up under one of their Lexus cars and wait for

one to unlock the car door Then I jump out, grab them by the leg,

shake the shit out of them and eat 'em!"  "Ah!" said the big

crocodile, "I

think I see your problem. You're not getting any real nourishment.

See, by 

the time you finish shaking the shit out of a politician, there's

nothing 

left but an asshole and a briefcase."